But seriously, I’ll pay you to pull the fire alarm

It is a horrible feeling to greatly anticipate something while simultaneously dread something else that needs to come before said event. Do you wish for it to come sooner and get everything over with? Or delay delay delay at all costs? After using some heavy duty bug spray in my room (you know it’s heavy duty because of the scary looking nozzle and obligatory exclamation mark on the can) I had dinner last night and halfway through began to worry I didn’t wash my hands well enough. The thought lingered long enough that I began to wonder how sick I had to get to be able to fly home straightaway while not so sick that I would hate myself being confined in a metal cylinder hurtling tens of thousands of feet through the air.

I didn’t get sick.

But in six hours this is all going to be over and even if the whole project that I have to present today bombs (I just checked—conclusion slides are still there!) it’s not going to matter that much. You see this is what everyone says, even me, to myself, but the fact of the matter is THAT DOES NOT HELP IN THE MOMENT when you are there, standing in front of everyone completely tongue-tied and wondering where that guy you paid to pull the fire alarm is.

This is the room I’ll be presenting in tomorrow. Looking at this in no way makes me want to freak out. I feel completely calm and am not worrying at all.

Just kidding y’all. It’s gonna be fine. No, really.

But seriously it will be.


Time to go pretend I’m not shy around these people and totally in control of my nerves and the Best Intern this account has ever seen.

I better get a trophy, or something.